Monday, October 3, 2011

What is it?

What is it about adoption that make some people so uncomfortable? What is it that makes people angry, uncomfortable, upset? What is it about adoption that gets people fired up one way or another? What is it  that makes people shout and yell and fight and accuse and mock?

Are we protecting the child? Protecting the country? Protecting a culture? Protecting a family? Protecting finances? Protecting stereotypes, racism, fools? What is it that makes us crazy about adoption one way or another?

I think there are many factors involved. Obviously when it comes to children, our children or other children, passions come to the surface. The recent movies, 5th quarter, soul surfer, and courageous highlight how our lives change when it comes to protecting children. As in much of life, opinions, politics, disagreements... we mostly all want the same thing and just have different ideas on how to obtain it. We all want the best for our children, and other children, and we just may have different ideas on what is best for them... well except for people who make selfish decisions but thats another story.

My main point is the contrast between people who think adoption is a good thing and people who think adoption is a bad thing. Obviously the best case scenario for any child is to live in a safe healthy happy family with their biological parents. However, despite every effort we could possibly make, there will ALWAYS be children who can not remain with their parents or biological relatives. There will ALWAYS (on this side of heaven) be children who are orphans. Now, it is my opinion that every child deserves a loving family and home. I understand that not everyone agrees with that, but it is how I feel. Now, if biological relatives are exhausted then the best choice for that child is to be adopted by a family who is capable of loving them and providing a safe and healthy happy home for them.

I would say that the vast majority of people in our culture think "thats great for some people", and live their lives believing solutions to these problems are other people's problems. As long as the "other people" who plan to adopt aren't friends of theirs or related to them, because if that is the case then they have an opinion. I do not know a single person who has started an adoption process and not had at least one friend or family member say something heartless to them. And that is what I am talking about.

What is it about these people in our culture that think that they need to tell others how to live their lives and what should be important to them? Why do they care so much if our family would rather adopt a few kids than take expensive vacations? Why must they impress their values (financial success) over our values? What is it about them that feel like their broken heartless opinions should even be spoken aloud. I am sure it is different for all of them. Whether it is spurred by fear, racism, personal experiences that hurt them... I believe that there is something else at the heart of it all. Rejection of the gospel.

This is not to say that everyone who rejects the gospel will reject adoption. But I have yet to meet someone who trusted in Christ who rejected adoption. Adoption is the story of the gospel. Adoption is the fatherless finding a father. Adoption is the lost being found. Adoption is sacrifice to increase the family. Adoption is love. Adoption is the Father.

It hurts when someone says heartless things to you when you adopting or passionate about adoption. That you are stupid, crazy, or trying to "save the world". I have heard everything from "selfish" to "not thinking of yourself". How many of them would say the same to a happily married adult who was pregnant with a child?

Adoption is not "saving a child", but sometime it saves a child. Adoption is not "changing the world", but sometimes it changes the world. I pray that one day my family will be changed by adoption in the literal sense, the way we have been changed by our adoption in Christ. And I wish the same for you.



1 comment:

  1. I can't imagine that anyone would not see adoption as a beautiful thing...


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